How To Get Through A Hard Time

Brindisi Olsen Bravo
6 min readMay 17, 2021

This list won’t make your problems go away, but it can give you the support you need to make it through these challenging times.

Photo by Krists Luhaers on Unsplash

Whether you’re caring for a newborn or an elderly parent, mourning the loss of a loved one or a lost job, hard times can be difficult to navigate. Some days just getting out of bed and taking a shower is a triumph.

If you’re struggling through a difficult week, month, or year, here are nine guidelines to help you get through a hard time.

1: Take Care Of Yourself

When life is in upheaval, it’s incredibly important that you take care of yourself and manage your needs. You’re already experiencing a lot of stress and discomfort, don’t add to it by neglecting your health.

Take care of your physical health by getting plenty of sleep, eating nutrient-dense foods, moving your body every day, and drinking lots of water.

Nurture your mental health by doing yoga, meditation, breathwork, grounding (walking or standing barefoot outside on grass or dirt), praying, journaling, or taking walks in nature.

2: Stick To A Routine

When life is chaotic, we crave predictability. One way you can fulfill this need for yourself is to establish a routine and stick to it. Wake up every day at the same time. Go to bed every day at the same time. Head to the gym every day, even if all you have strength to do is walk on the treadmill for 15 minutes.

The key is to create consistency and stability. And this will help you to feel balanced during these turbulent times.

That being said, you are going through a hard time. So make sure your routine is simple and something you can stick to, even on your toughest days. Now is not the time to establish an intense, rigorous routine. You just need something that will create structure for your life right now.

3: Simplify Your Life

Along those lines, now is the time to simplify your life. When experiencing a lengthy period of stress, grief, anxiety, or depression, simplicity will sustain you through these hard times.

Some ways you can simplify your life include:

––Stop volunteer experiences, like church work or the PTA

––Outsource chores by hiring a house cleaner, dog walker, nanny, or use a meal prep service

––Find carpools for your kids

––Cut back your hours at work, or work more hours from home

Take whatever steps you can to simplify your life during this difficult time.

4: Take Frequent, Healthy Breaks

When experiencing prolonged periods of stress, your energy reserves can be depleted quite quickly. Help yourself recover throughout the day by taking frequent, healthy breaks.

Some examples of energizing breaks include:

— taking a short walk

— eating a nutritious snack

— taking a quick nap

— calling a friend/family member

— writing a thank you note

— meditating

— yoga

— breathwork

— stretching

— going on a weekend trip

5: Apologize Quickly

Regulating your emotions during hard times can be difficult. You’re likely to be more irritated, sad, angry, and frustrated. You’re also more likely to make mistakes and have meltdowns or outbursts.

However, now is when you need the support of those around you the most. And it’s important to still nurture and care for those relationships.

Establish a practice of apologizing quickly. The sooner you apologize, the sooner you’ll be able to repair any damage you may have done. And it can help to assuage any pain you may unintentionally cause to those around you while navigating a difficult time.

If you need some pointers on making a good apology, check out this article.

6: Practice Self-Compassion

We are often our biggest critic. And our inner voice can get even more harsh when we’re stuck in a difficult period. It’s always important to practice self-compassion, but it’s even more critical when we’re experiencing prolonged struggles.

Try practicing self-compassion instead.

Start by validating your feelings. Try using phrases like, “Of course I’m feeling sluggish. I’m still grieving the death of my father,” or “It makes sense that I’m feeling overwhelmed. My newborn baby doesn’t sleep and I’m exhausted from caring for her and my toddler all day.” Validating your experiences and feelings is an important part of self-compassion.

Next, write down three things every day that make you proud of yourself. They can be little triumphs like, “I got dressed today,” or “I got to work on time.” Or they can be bigger successes like, “I went to therapy” or “I went to a job interview.”

Acknowledging your accomplishments — big or small — is part of being self-compassionate. It will also increase your self-confidence, which may be lacking after all the struggles you’ve been through.

7: Ask For Help

There may come a point when you just can’t do it on your own. And that’s okay. Reaching out to family, friends, coworkers, classmates, and your community is a healthy way to navigate challenging times.

The people in your life can support you by providing meals, babysitting your children, organizing a fundraiser, providing donations, and so much more.

If you’re nervous to ask for help, start small. Ask for help with carpooling or have someone come over and play with your kids while you clean. You’ll find that even the smallest requests will make your life easier.

8: Work With A Licensed Therapist

Along with asking for help, working with a licensed therapist during challenging times will be very helpful. It is a therapist’s job to provide support by listening to your struggles and helping you navigate them.

If your emotions are too big to regulate or your struggles are too heavy to bear or you just need someone who will listen, working with a therapist will be an important step towards healing.

If you need some tips for starting therapy, check out this article.

9: Spark Joy

During difficult times, you may struggle to feel positive emotions like joy, peace, happiness, and so on. If this is the case, you’re going to have to spark your own joy while waiting out the storm.

Spend 20 minutes each day trying to spark joy. The joy may not come every time, and that’s okay. Just spending time doing something fun will be beneficial on its own.

Start by slowing down. Positive emotions such as joy and peace can often be found in the little moments. So slow down and try to set your problems and worry aside for just 20 minutes (which is difficult, I know).

Next, try your best to be present. Focus on the sights, sounds, and textures around you. Close your eyes and listen. Take a deep breath. Touch objects around you. Use your senses to keep you centered on the moment.

Some examples of sparking joy include:

— watching the clouds

— stargazing

— trying to see how fast you can run

— caring for plants/trees

— cuddling with family members (including pets)

— dancing to music

— making music

— writing poetry

— creating art

— writing a thank you note

— arranging flowers

— practicing a hobby

— roasting a marshmallow

— trying a new recipe

— going for a walk

— blowing bubbles

— taking a bath

— reading a book

— photography/videography

— playing a board/card game

Conclusion: You Can Do This

It’s been tough. And maybe you’re worried you’ll never make it out of this haze. But you can do this. Spend the next few weeks focusing on this list. Accomplishing these items may not make your problems go away, but they can give you the support you need to make it through these challenging times.

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Brindisi Olsen Bravo

Navigating adult life and writing about what I learn. My focuses are personal development, relationships, parenting, and writing.